Hello Guys yes I’m back! I’ve been off of social media meaning Instagram, snapchat and also the blog, after having my baby i experienced for the first time postpartum depression, is crazy for me to even be able to say it out loud, after a couple of things happened in my life that hopefully soon enough i will be able to share it with the world, my mood totally changed,
and the way i felt was so complicated and hard to explain, i didn’t reject the baby or anything of that kind, but i stared struggling breastfeeding when before i never had that problem with him, and no matter how healthy i ate my milk just dried up, meaning no more than 2 oz or 3 with luck which was crazy, when with only one boob i will pumped 5 to 6 oz in less than an hour.
But the most difficult and weird thing was when i tried to breast feed my baby as soon as he latched, i will feel this sadness coming from the inside and also my mood will change drastically i didn’t want to talk i was always sad, which was so weird because everyone that knows me will know that I’m such a happy person, so i stared googling my symptoms (i have to google everything first) and thats when i read about depression, even though i kinda knew that was the reason, but i was really shy to even talk to anyone about it, specially as i felt that people will judge me for even feeling this way, i just had a newborn so everybody will expect me to be so happy and full of joy, and all i was doing is cry and wonder what was wrong with me which made it even worse, so i looked for help called my doctor and also talked to friends and family which helped me a lot, but the thing that helped the most was taking my own time to get better, and say and do the things i needed to say or do for my own good, and reading about so many moms that went through this also helped me a lot. i can finally say that i am 100% enjoying my motherhood.
I hope this help any mom or anybody experiencing depression, don’t stay quiet, talk to a friend, family, stranger or anybody but don’t keep it to yourself because depression is a real thing!! and anybody could go through it.